Davezilla

Clean humor, filthy comments

Malapropisms and mispronunciations

  1. “perifeal vision” (heard on CNN)
  2. “samwichiz (heard on CNN)
  3. “perdickuler” (neighbor)
  4. “fedral mandrate” (heard on CSPAN2)
  5. “teepanated” (heard at work)
  6. “for all intensive purposes” (heard on CNN)
  7. “lack toast and tolerant” (heard at work)
  8. “I guess it was just a pigment of my imagination.” (same neighbor)
  9. “My glasses were so foggied up with compensation.” (heard at Pier One)
  10. “Michael Jackson sleeps in a hyperactive chamber.” (heard at Starbucks)
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Davezilla

I like strong coffee, stronger beer and droppin' the bass.


Comments ( 28 )

  1. Oh and by the way on that one..

    It was this stupid girl in my class and when she said it, I laughed..

    But no one else got it.. 🙁

  2. Make no mistake:

    bzzzt! red alert! man yer battle stations! major BS to follow! Prepare to receive major spin!! Weapons! Mass! Destruction! Yer! With! Me! or! Yer! with! thuh! Terr’rists!

  3. # “Michael Jackson sleeps in a hyperactive chamber.”

    this could actually be true…

    some of the others are very funny and often repeated, everywhere…

  4. 3 dimensions? With my per-ferial vision I can see in like 20 dimensions (spoken by a co-worker, and because of repeating this quote, I can no longer pronounce peripheral)

  5. My dad used to work at a ‘noocular’ plant and my grandmother was afraid that all that radiation would make it so his ‘tessicles’ wouldn’t ‘work like they should.’

    This was my grandmother’s fear–mine was that my grandmother would never learn decent diction.

  6. I thinks it’s funny how almost everyone says pronounciation when it’s actually pro-nun-ciation! Go ahead…look it up!

  7. Tinamarie: are you sure Granny wasn’t saying “teslacles” (which would make more sense, considering the generation of electrical energy and all)?

  8. When I was younger my mother used to make us girl cheese for lunch and biscetti for dinner. I’m much older and and i still slip up and say them like that from time to time.

  9. Akshully, getting back to Tinamarie and her Granny, it could have been “Tesla Coils” she was saying, not testicles. You never know how brilliant some people are…

    I’ve got a cold. That’s why my brain hasn’t been working at full charge.

  10. I worked as a cop with a fellow many years named Hicks. We put together the “Hicks-tionary”.
    The fire was distinquished.
    I’m stopping a VCR van. (RV)
    I’m stopping a Terrolla Terrolla. (Toyota Corolla)
    I’m stopping a Dodge Aspirin.
    I’m stopping tag two-one-nine A-Alice, Q-Cuba.
    Many, many more!

  11. Repeated to me by a physician as told to him by his patient when asking about the patient’s medical history: and I quote: I have fireballs of the ukerrus (fibroids of the uterus)… this is a true story:smile:

    same physician told me… a patient when asked about whether or not their insurance will pay for a particular procedure… “Oh, yes, my HBO will take care of that!!!!

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