Anagram Interview: Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen
Created Nov. 6, 2000DISCLAIMER: Before you scratch your head or send me hate mail, please note that this is a fake interview. The answers were created by rearranging the letters in this celebrity’s name [anagramming].
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen needs no introduction to most web site professionals. His web site, Alertbox, features bi-weekly rants about everything Web designers are doing wrong, from Flash to GIF animation to non-standard link colors.
A controversial writer and lecturer, he is the author of Designing Web Usability: The Practice of Simplicity. I met up with Jakob to hear his side of the story:
Davezilla: How would you describe the typical Alertbox reader?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Alertbox junkies? Plebian yetis.
Davezilla: Do you feel that too many graphics are to blame for the bandwidth slowdowns on the Web?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Barely. Obstinate pixel-junkies.
Davezilla: Oh so you blame the designers. And you’ve written that when designers use Flash, sites get ignored by the search engines.
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Pixel-junkies liberate any bots...
Davezilla: Jakob, you’ve said Web writing needs to be more concise. How do you tell if paragraphs are just too wordy?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Juxtapose its break line by line.
Davezilla: I see you have “Hawaiian Tropic Swimsuit Judge” on your tour schedule. Could you explain what you will be doing?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Alertbox panel just eyes bikini.
Davezilla: Do your detractors heckle you at these type of events?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: Expose bikini; blatantly jeer us.
Davezilla: You seem bleak in your columns. Aren’t you getting laid enough?
Usability Expert Jakob Nielsen: I? Bleak? I enjoy six brunettes’ lap!
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