LIZZ: “Phaedra? Would you like some chicken?”
PHAEDRA: “No! I don’t like chicken anymore today. I’d rather eat myself.”

DAUGHTER: “Daddy? I need a new diaper.”
ME: “You do? OK, I think we can handle that.”
ME: “Oh, this is a bad one.”
DAUGHTER: “Don’t worry, Daddy. It’s only poop. It not bite you.”