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January 27, 2002 :: "B.U.M.MER"

You’ve all seen those sweatshirts sold under the name B.U.M. Athletic Gear. Aptly named. Everyone I have ever seen wearing them is an abdominous, wheeezing sea cow. Strangers to health and fitness, they believe that by wearing voluminous, cotton yurts, they will seem associated with fitness. If they really were, they would not be stuffing their gaping maws with two Cinnabuns in rapid succession.

Oh they’re in shape, don’t get me wrong. I just question whether the dodecahedron is a shape that anyone wishes to emulate.

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He said. She said. There’s 7 Comments

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You know, I've always felt the same way about those Big Dog shirts, that say in gigantic block letters "If you can't run with the Big Dogs, stay on the porch!" They're always worn by behemoths whose only "running" seems to entail lunging up to the buffet table for thirds at the all-you-can-eat brunch.
amyc :: 27 January, 2002 01:43 PM

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thanks for the warning about the flash. that was ultra ick
guppy :: 27 January, 2002 03:35 PM

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I don’t think I’ve had the displeasure of seeing a Big Dog shirt Amy.

Someday I will expound on my theories regarding the No Fear shirt.
Davezilla :: 27 January, 2002 07:17 PM

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how bout those "big daddy" shirts. yarg. incestuous AND gigantic. either that or an electra complex
me :: 27 January, 2002 08:11 PM

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The "No Fear" logo is usually seen here as a decal on the back of pickups driven by people on crystal meth (or at least who drive like they are.)
Charles :: 28 January, 2002 02:32 AM

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Big Dogs.
amyc :: 28 January, 2002 09:49 AM

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I always thought that stood for Big Ugly Monkey.
adam :: 28 January, 2002 11:41 AM

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