davezilla.com > current: November 06, 2001: "Links that make my brain bleed"

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November 06, 2001 :: "Links that make my brain bleed"

These links are ... well you decide. You may love these and waste all day playing. You may throw your PC off a cliff. I claim no responsibility.

Knockers the Klown
Man I just don’t know. Clowns scare the crap outta me. This you already know. Klowns with a K are even worse. Degenerates that wear clown garb, pee in public, strip in front of kids and throw up on purpose. Hmmm, I don’t see how that’s much different from regular clowns...

Hairy Tongue
I guess this is a humor site. But one can never be too sure. Features upscale sections such as the Shitty Portrait Gallery and Dodgy Sex Aids.

Baby Doll Tattoo Gallery
Some of these are really cute; some just suck. People with too much time on their hands turning dolls into messy Wiccan dolls with tattoos. I don’t understand the point, but someone likes them so rock on wit’ yo bad self.

Guerilla Artist
The site claims, “The Guerrilla-DV-Crew is a group of ruthless mercaneries who are devoted to cleansing the ARTISTIC VIBE of CAPITAL INFLUENCE.” Word. Seems more like a starving artist gallery. Jakob Nielsen would explode on contact with the background image and colors. Come to think of it, I nearly did too.

Fanny Batter’s World of Fun
“Bringing a touch of class to the Net since the turn of the century.” Low class apparently. This is some sort of online store; a cross between Spencer‘s Gifts and a sex shop. You may opt to have goods sent discreetly or “very indiscreetly and needing to be signed for when delivered. A must for getting revenge on your bitterest enemies!” Big fun. I guess.

He said. She said. There’s 6 Comments

Thank you, Dave! Because I'm a curious and strange individual, I clicked on the Fanny Batter link. How lovely to have my husband come into the room just as I had scrolled to the bottom of the page to see the "mould a willy" kit.
Becky :: 06 November, 2001 03:11 AM

Happy to help out Becky. How many did you buy?
Davezilla :: 06 November, 2001 07:04 AM

I'm sure Jakob Nielsen would say that the Fanny Batter site breaks some fundamental rules of e-commerce, by failing to provide some essential product information. I mean, I'd hate to buy one of the "mould a willy" kits only to find on receipt that the mould is too small...
Keith :: 06 November, 2001 11:55 AM

Thanks for the mention, looking at the access logs I noticed hits to the site have doubled to a cracking 78 in the last 24hrs. Davezilla is my top referrer!

I can assure you all that we have never had a single complaint w.r.t. the willy mould kit. Taking into account the practical certainty that the user will incur painful pubic entanglement with the surgical moulding compound (not that I'm talking from experience or anything!) it amazes me that we're yet to be pursued for legal damages related to inadvertent genital mutilation.

Incidentally, Kieth... If you'd like to supply address details I am happy to provide a mould kit f.o.c. Perhaps you'd be able to then vouch for the unquestionable quality of FanBat's glorious stockpile?

... "Low class" indeed. ;-)

Andy
Andy from Fannybatter :: 07 November, 2001 03:29 AM

Being a satisfied customer of Fannybatter.com, I thought it only right that I leap to their defence! Only the other day I bought an Inflatable Doll from these good people and found her to be a most consciencous lover! Having pumped her pull of jizz, she tucked away nicely in my side drawer! Show me a woman who can do that!!!!!!
Bardo :: 07 November, 2001 06:07 AM

My sister LaToya can!
Michael Jackson :: 07 November, 2001 07:53 AM