Caption Time #205
Davezilla: Clean Humor, Filthy Comments © Dave Linabury 1994-2008. Unrelated to Toho, its products or services.
Freedom-Black and Widgetized by Tina Silva | Freedom Blue Plus improved by Eyoung. Kudos to Frank Helmschrott, Michael and Fredrik for the original Design.
Sometimes I really am rendered speechless.
Guess who got caught with their hand in the mustard jar!
Mean Mr Mustard
His sister Pam works in a shop
She never stops, she’s a go-getter
Takes him out to look at the queen
Only place that he’s ever been
Always shouts out something obscene
Such a dirty old man
:wtf:”I swear! The other guys told me there was a hotdog prize in the bottom of the jug!”
During his first, last and only day of employment at Burger Buster, it became readily apparent that Leroy did not pay attention during the training video,
“How to Open a Mustard Jar”. And it kinda looks like he lost a fight with the Pickle Guy and the Tomato Guy.
IT WASN’T ME
Did I Do that???
Low tech paintball fight …
“Do you mind? I’m in the middle of a very complex burger assembly here.”
Pooh gets caught with his paw in the honey jar
Confucius say:
When Rosie O’ Donnell invite you over for hot dog night, make sure full moon not out.
But I ordered my hot dog with sauerkraut, not mustard!
—
Flustered by how the other elves ganged up on him, Zipster was aghast as the other Buster Burger manager trainees walked out at the end of the shift. Zipster would be alone to clean up. There were only 12 minutes left before the hated PPP (’Permanent Paler Picker’, former Drill Sergeant) Drutin would arrive to empty trash cans - and squeal to franchise owner Lymon Vunk about the messy store. Zipster was unsure how the food fight started, but he was kinda sure - he lost.
—
“I *told* you this salad stuff wouldn’t work - I’m a *pastry* chef!”
But…but…but it feels SOOOOOO good!
I have unfortunatly worked with people like this…
Once exposed for his Mustard fetish, Ralph retreated to a life of solitude.
I’ll tell you what I see here. Two Tards!!! Mus & Re.
Stand perfectly still…he can’t see you…
Honestly! The customer said ‘hold the mustard’…
A stunned Luke “The Kitchen Tornado” Johnson stands aghast as his bid become the best fast-food cook in the land falls to pieces while trying to open a new chain of 5-Second Service burger joints.
It was Colonel Mustard in the pantry with the knife!
opps
Whatever you do, don’t ask him to hold the pickle!
“who you callin’ yella?”
That new Hollywood Mustard Diet does not appear to be working.
Who took the cookies from the mustard jar?
…what do you mean, mustard’s not for lovin’?
Mr. Krabs! Spongeboob Roundbutts is having a meltdown in the kitchen…
AnnieB’s cousin Bubba who likes to dip his weenie
in the mustard jar. He is in big demand at parties.
thank God it was mustard. If it would have been mayo, I don’t think I could have kept my lunch.
Sasquatch captured in Home Depot break room. News at eleven.
Dave…
Where do you keep finding pictures of my brothers-in-law?
Frenchy could be very resourceful when the vaseline was all but gone and Arthur was impatiently waiting.
It’s the newest attempt at REDNECK FINGERPAINTING, they will just have to keep trying.
I remember this! It’s from FATSO, a wonderful film with DOM de LUISE (written and directed by Anne Bancroft). The CHUBBY CHECKERS help out DOMINICK while he tries to lose weight. Of course, all hell breaks loose when the Fat Guys Sing for the Keys and Junior is threatened with being cut down to his balls.
No, wait a minute, I’m wrong, this guy isn’t in the film… It’s still a good movie. Great supporting cast including Ron Carey, Rudy de Luca, Candice Azzara and of course, Anne Bancroft.
Wait… Is this that picture of Bigfoot I keep hearing about?
“Worst. Mustard. Ever.”
“Hey, I eat my vegetables! Mustard IS a vegetable, it’s made from a mustard plant so it’s a vegetable!
Good one Pablo
[Comment ID #210433 will be quoted here]
Jack was hot. Really hot. Not just irritated at Janice, helplessly laughing at him. Not just sweltering in the August heat with the Air Conditioner broken. No, this was worse .. more personal.
Janice had almost sounded reasonable. Jack had complained (out loud - that was probably the first mistake!) about the rash under his scrotum, from all the hours sweating since the a/c broke down in the kitchen at Nana’s Swamp Shack and Bait Howse. Beer hadn’t relieved the itching, and letting Snuffles the old Blue Heeler that wandered in every now and then to lick the .. affected area .. had only helped for a couple of hours. So when Janice suggested Mustard would clear up the irritation, hey! anything that might help ..
But the mustard burned. Hot burn. 20 minutes later an now a 3rd degree rash kind of burn. And Janice laughed just on, and on, and on! When she told him to be sure to wash it off with cold water, to prevent making it ‘hot’ for days, Jack assumed this was also to make fun of him. And the hot water really did turn up the heat, and leave it there.
And the doctors and nurses and attendants and candy stripers and ambulance drivers and janitors and *visitors* for goodness’ sakes at the emergency clinic all had to look and “Ooh!” and “Ah!” at the brightly glowing *region* down there. And one nurse was kind enough to tell Jack that frequent washing with soap and water would have taken care of the problem.
And Janice is still laughing.
LOST’s Hurley attempts to reintegrate into civilization.
I just know she’s the kinda girl who’ll rip all her clothes off, if I just put a little bit of mustard on my man boobs!
I just like the complete look of innocence…
“I could have sworn this was the jar I hid my weed in!”