She’s such a dog

23 August, 2007 Latest: Tom, Driver, Pablo, Lung the Younger, Yucca,

Over the years, I have seen several marginally funny lists of why men are like dogs and women are like cats. I propose the opposite. Men are more like cats and women are more like dogs. I offer my reasons below. Please add any I missed (or disagree).

Men are like cats because:

  1. When you need them, they suddenly go deaf to their name being called
  2. Both clean their feet by kicking dirt in every direction
  3. They have no reservations about climbing on furniture, shelves, walls…
  4. Both like resting on women’s breasts, hips
  5. Getting licked by one is often a rough bit of business

Women are like dogs because:

  1. Like dogs, they pee on the carpet for six weeks until they finally learn to use the newspaper
  2. They both tear up the neighbors’ flower gardens
  3. Both women and dogs greet you by sniffing your crotch
  4. They both have an irrational fear of postal carriers and will chase them across the lawn
  5. They both growl when you try to take the tennis ball away from them
Please add any I missed.

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19 comments:

  1. StevieC, 23, August 2007, 7:39 |  
    StevieC

    Men are like cats because they can roam freely without the need for supervision.

    Women are like dogs because they need to be leashed or caged at all times.

     
  2. Anton, 23, August 2007, 9:03 |  
    Anton

    Men are like cats because they spend nine tenths of the day in their own little world.

    Women are like dogs because they spent nine tenths of the day trying to butt into a mans little world.

     
  3. binary-zero, 23, August 2007, 9:27 |  

    nice one :d :P

     
  4. Spud, 23, August 2007, 10:15 |  
    Spud

    Men are like cats because they like to served.

    Women are like dogs because they follow you everywhere.

     
  5. April, 23, August 2007, 11:05 |  

    Wow, the women you meet … :wtf:

     
  6. junkman, 23, August 2007, 12:27 |  
    junkman

    men- kill for the sake of killing. women- will live with larger mammals that think they are masters. men- will have a spat over food, territory, gender differences, anything that looks at them sideways, worthless toys etc. women- stay loyal often times without so much as a pat to the head. men- want out. want in. want out. want in. want out. women- allow themselves to be leashed to retards men- complain for no good reason women- will lick you just about anywhere if they love you and you’re good to them.

     
  7. Pookazilla, 23, August 2007, 12:46 |  

    Men are like cats because they’re always trying to lick themselves.

    Women are like dogs because they’re looking for a warm butt on a cold night….and because they can get you a beer from the fridge during a football game. :wtf:

     
  8. family jules, 23, August 2007, 13:07 |  
    family jules

    I’ve often been told that men are dogs, and I have always said “I WISH!”

    I wish I had a man who would love me no matter how fat, old or grey I get!

    I wish I had a man whose greatest desire was to make me happy!

    I wish I had a man who would throw himself in front of an angry bear to protect me!

    I wish I had a man who would be loyal to me alone!

    I wish I had a man who only required I feed him and rub his belly and let him sleep with me and he was happy. (Oh wait, I have that!)

    I wish men were more like dogs. But I fear you are right, men are like cats and women are like dogs…for all the above reasons.

     
  9. Astryd, 23, August 2007, 13:48 |  
    Astryd

    :boob: get excited when you pet them and smother you with affection :wang: demand attention but only when They feel needy. :boob: can sense and get excited when their owner is a mile away from home. :wang: may lift head to see who’s at the door. :boob: will destroy your property if they feel you’ve abandoned them. :wang: won’t tell you What’s wrong but will let you know it Something by doing something awful to your shoes. :boob: will eat, sleep, play, cruise, veg, etc. with you if you let them. :wang: will catch something ’special’ eat half and if they love you, bring you the other (possibly nastier)half to share with you. (even if you don’t like it, it’s still nice to know you care :kiss: ) :boob: will protect home and loved ones from whatever may be threatening, at times risking or sacrificing their own lives. :wang: it is obvious when they are ‘happy’ and they shove their heads into your hands, lap, chest so you’ll pet them. :boob: they wag their tails and smile/pant when they want you to pet them. :wang: may Never get used to or accept the “other one” in your life. You’ll always hear at least a low growl when the other is within range. :boob: will bark lowdly and agressively and a lot of times bite anyone/thing trespassing their territory/compromizing, endangering, jeopardizing their possessions (includes owners). :wang: sleep 16 hours a day, not noticing your absence until they want something. :boob: wait anxiously by the door when it’s time for you to get home to greet you because they’ve missed you so.

     
  10. AnnieB, 23, August 2007, 15:13 |  
    AnnieB

    Men are like cats because they like to play with anything that moves.

    Women are like dogs because we like to wag our tails.

    :P

     
  11. Flash Gordon, 23, August 2007, 15:35 |  
    Flash Gordon

    Wag that thing, AnnieB! :thong: :thong: :undies: :wang: :wang:

     
  12. Meagan, 23, August 2007, 17:36 |  
    Meagan

    On August 23, 2007, StevieC furiously scribbled: Men are like cats because they can roam freely without the need for supervision. Women are like dogs because they need to be leashed or caged at all times.
    9017 will be quoted here]

    Woof! :twisted:

     
  13. Bjorn Freeh, 23, August 2007, 17:51 |  
    Bjorn Freeh

    Clearly, this man was a cool cat:

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=TzXL205vHmc

     
  14. Tom, 23, August 2007, 17:57 |  

    Very Funny!

    I’m like a cat because I love rubbing against girl’s legs and purring.

     
  15. Driver, 23, August 2007, 22:15 |  

    Is this like the guy who says he’s a lesbian because he loves to eat pussy cause I’m a dog who loves to eat pussy so does that make me a cat? I’M SO CONFUSED!

    Men are like cats because they like to hunt in a stealth mode.

    Women are like dogs because they like to hunt in noisy packs.

     
  16. Pablo, 23, August 2007, 23:39 |  
    Pablo

    Women are more like a cross between a elephant and an alligator: They never forget and it will eventually bite you in the ass.

     
  17. Lung the Younger, 24, August 2007, 3:14 |  

    Cats:

    Even if you manage to get a man up off the sofa, he’ll climb back onto it once you leave the room.

    Men like to roam freely at night and when they come back, will often wake the neighbors with their screeching.

    Men ignore your friends when they come to visit.

    Men’s shit smells worse.

    Dogs:

    Women try to make you feel guilty with puppy eyes when you have to go out and leave them at home.

    Women are intrusively curious of your friends when they come to visit.

    Chase after men in fast cars.

    Mark their territory with scent.

    Enjoy the occasional bone.

     
  18. Spud, 24, August 2007, 3:19 |  
    Spud

    Winner!

     
  19. Yucca, 24, August 2007, 21:15 |  

    men/cats: they fear dogs Women/dogs: yhey dominate cats :???: