Overheard: Thai Restaurant Edition

Scene: Natalie and I are eating Thai in what we thought was a private booth. Behind us was a grandmother and her two unruly grandchildren.

Grandmother: Mawcus? Mawcus! You’ve taken in too much food. Spit it out. Spit it out right now, young man. Right here. Spit it out on the table.
Marcus: Plplpltew!
Granddaughter: Ew!
Grandmother: That’s bettah.
Marcus: Grandma? Who is better? Me or my cousins?
Grandmother: No one is better.
Marcus: But you said my cousins have better manners. So that makes them better.
Grandmother: I nevah said that. I said they had bettah mannuhs. That doesn’t make them bettah than you.
Marcus: Grandma? Who is Grandma Rose?
Granddaughter: That’s Grandma’s grandma, stupid!
Grandmother: Nevah tawk to your brothuh like that. She’s your great grandma, that’s who.
Granddaughter: That’s what I said.
Grandmother: Finish your food. I’m tawking to your brothah.
Marcus: Grandma? Who is your great grandma?
Grandmother: That was hundreds of years ago. No one knows. Finish your food.

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15 comments:

  1. adognamedgromit, 18, February 2007, 1:06 |  

    This could be a whole category
    “Conversations you shouldn’t over hear in public.”
    Although that one wasn’t too bad.

    I recently was standing in the passport line up and listening to this lady recites the horrible details of her marriage failing in a public place. I clearly overheard “so who is the other woman? that b*tch”
    OMFG you should be having that conversation somewhere else privately. “I’ll talk to you later” was all that I should have heard.

    Perhaps I have to get this t-shirt that reads
    “I’m blogging this”
    http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts/generic/5eb7/

     
  2. Spud, 18, February 2007, 3:29 |  

    These ones strike me as interesting…

    1. 1716: Banda Bahadur, a Sikh military leader, was tortured and executed by gouging his eyes out, followed by slashing his limbs off. The executioner went on to tear his flesh off with red-hot pincers. (ouch)

    2. 1911: Jack Daniel, founder of the Tennessee whiskey distillery, died of blood poisoning six years after receiving a toe injury when he kicked his safe in anger at being unable to remember its combination code. (that’ll teach ya)

    3. 1935: Baseball player Len Koenecke was bludgeoned to death with a fire extinguisher by the crew of an aircraft he had chartered, after provoking a fight with the pilot while the plane was in the air. (woops)

    4. 1972: Leslie Harvey, guitarist of Stone the Crows was electrocuted on stage by a live microphone. (sound check!)

    5. 1983: Tennessee Williams, American playwright, died choking on a bottle cap. He was in a hotel but was too drunk to leave his room or make sufficient noise to attract attention. (ummmmm)

    As for the overheard conversation, all I can add would be something along the lines of “ifanyo kids don shaddup, ima gonna smack yo inside out…”

    :wtf:

     
  3. sledge, 18, February 2007, 8:17 |  

    Sounds familiar,dysfunctional family and grandma…really, a tire iron applied sharply to the side of the head may get their attention.By the way, what wre they doing on a athai restauruant and not in Mickey D’s?

     
  4. Tara, 18, February 2007, 9:55 |  

    Spit out Thai Food sounds truly gross.

     
  5. Meagan, 18, February 2007, 10:38 |  

    I think I’d rather die laughing than being eaten alive. :puke: :dead:

     
  6. Brad K., 18, February 2007, 10:44 |  

    I think the ‘I am blogging this’ t-shirt might be for sale at ‘http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/’ (Overheard in New York).

    Trying to picture this tableau of fine dining, I have to wonder. Seems the kids are behaving more appropriately than Grandma. If the kids behave, I assume their parents are adequate at discipline, social graces, instructing, and nurturing. So who raised them? Granted, Grandma might only be 1/4 the gene pool for the kids, but how could she have raised a responsible parent for the kids, if in that time she hadn’t learned anything of tact, couth, honesty, or courtesy?

    I think the kids were kidnapped. Call Child Protective Services. Or ‘Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector’. (I can’t wait for his upcoming movie, ‘Delta Farce’.)

     
  7. adognamedgromit, 18, February 2007, 14:06 |  

    I wish The Sultan of Cleveland would post more. I liked that. It was funny with two enchantrments.

    :???: :java: :java:

     
  8. Bigwavdave, 18, February 2007, 14:46 |  

    Honestly Dave - Aren’t we are subjected to sufficient rude behavior, bad language, ill-mannered temperments, and just plain boors in our own every-day lives without having to relive your unfortunate random encounters on a weekly basis? Can’t we just stick with sex, politics, various religious matters, and of course a plethora of preposterous photographs? Did I mention sex?

     
  9. pablo, 18, February 2007, 15:50 |  

    Not that this conversation sucks, or that it would have bored me to the point of tossing food at them for pure entertainment value, I am happy it is not just another “Hey, how do you get curry stains out of white?” post.

    Can’t wait until you can dress to match your food Dave!

     
  10. Mikeme, 18, February 2007, 19:18 |  
    Mikeme

    I thought you said a “thigh” restaurant! :undies: :undies:

     
  11. Davezilla, 19, February 2007, 1:09 |  
    Davezilla

    [Comment ID #90894 will be quoted here]

    I guess it was funnier to us enduring it.

    :-|

     
  12. Mandy, 19, February 2007, 11:01 |  
    Mandy

    [Comment ID #91067 will be quoted here]

    YUM! :wang:

     
  13. chainstay, 19, February 2007, 11:19 |  

    On a similar note. Don’t you hate/get a kick out of people walking in the supermarket and talking about their private lives on their cell phones as if nobody else can hear them? “I tell you what Betty, my Frank tried to stick it in there once too. I told him if he ever tried that again I would cut it off!”

     
  14. mikeB, 19, February 2007, 12:52 |  
    mikeB

    [Comment ID #91919 will be quoted here]

    I’ll try to be quieter next time. I apologize for Betty.

     
  15. Meagan, 19, February 2007, 23:17 |  

    You guys should’ve heard my conversation between me and my friends today when a friend of mine gave me a chocolate penis-shaped lollipop for a birthday present. And we were in the cafeteria at the time! :P :wang: