The next time you travel, you are not letting your black cat play inside the suitcase while you pack, ensuring your white shirt will be coated in black fur. Also check that you have removed any chocolates from your suitcase that may inexplicably get stuck on your pants when you press them with the hotel’s cheap iron.
Looks like someone borked the comments on this post. Trying to fix them. Your patience is greatly underappreciated.
[Sitting behind me on plane]
Traveler #1: “Whut wuz thayat?”
Traveler #2: “I bet it wuzza wheelz comin’ down.”
Traveler #1: “Wheelz? Fer real?”
Traveler #2: “Yessir. We’s sittin’ raht above the plane’s wang.”
Traveler #1: “We surely are! I ain’t never been above the wang afore.”
Traveler #2: “Yessir. It’s a good spot. Git t’see ever thing from here.”
Traveler #1: “Lookit that wang.”
Traveler #2: “Mm-Hm.”
Traveler #1: “Jim?”
Traveler #2: “Yeah?”
Traveler #1: “I’m fixin’ to barf.”
I was IMing with my friend Jim S. when we got on one of those odd topics. I know. Moi? Talk about something weird? So we’re talking about astral bodies, something I find both fascinating and well … highly improbable.
I just don’t buy into it. Not the fact that it’s, you know, bullshit. I’ve heard worse. Like that Ark story. I’m talking about the inconvenience of having an astral body. I mean, I can barely take care of this one, and now I have to take care of an invisible body, too? That just doesn’t seem fair. I’m far too busy to fit one more exercise regimen into my schedule.
What’s its jacket size? Does it find that Lycra chafes? Is it also averse to synthetic blends? These are the things I need to know. Help me here.
Flashdance or Clan of the Cave Bear? You decide…
