All the elements of a good story
Longtime readers may recall an incident in December, 2004 involving my neighbor leaving her thong on the welcome mat. On Friday evening, I heard her and two of her drunk girlfriends stumbling up the stairs. After a lot of giggling and swearing, I clearly heard my neighbor plead, “Don’t pee in the cup! I’ll find my keys.”
Needless to say, that got my attention. I ventured out into the hallway to see if there were any “accidents” on the carpeting. No, but I did find a miniskirt, thong and … paperclip. It’s the paperclip that intrigues me most.
Any guesses?
Tags: Klassy with a capital K, What the.
OMG that’s NOT a paperclip! I hope you didn’t touch it or anything.
One paper clip to bind them and in the darkness to find them.
LOL Spud. Well said.
The paper clip might have been used to hold the loosened elastic wasitband of the thongs?
I’m guessing MacGuyver has moved into your building and was interrupted in his attempts to assemble a trap for the mysterious Davezilla, but what do I know? This looks like a job for…Barney Fife!
Well, had to pee really bad. Maybe she was trying to “pinch it off.”
Maybey, your neighbor likes you or she’s stalking you, either way I would expect more presents on your doorstep.
Maybe, Dave old man, they were a group of nymphomanic CPAs, bringing their work home with them. In the National Association of Certified Public Accountants, the sign of a skirt, thong and sacred paper clip left on a door step means….”Come take us and help us multiply!”
Personally, I think it’s time to move.
Wow, I’m proud of me for getting that thingie next to my name.
I had a thingy next to my name once… but a divorce settled that!
Jeez, I hade when that happens….the clock strikes midnight and your date turns into a paperclip.
I have NEVER used a paper clip for a wardrobe malfunctiom. Now had it been a binder clip, I could have suggested at least 3 uses.
LMAO Lung.
What is the paper looking thingy by the thong….GAWD I hope it isn’t a panty liner.
I think they were trying to pick the lock.
I’ve yet to pick a lock with a paper clip.
perhaps they were going to use the paper clip to pick the lock, since she couldn’t find her keys? At least she didn’t pee on the carpet… :P
I’m thinkin’ the paper clip was part of a piercing. :P
Either you are a weirdness magnet, or you have an awesome imagination.
What’s to guess?
It’s obviousry the aftermath of a supplies party.
I would’ve been more intrigued if there had not been a paper clip present.
Wish I had thought of that, Other!
Obviousry!
I wish i lived next door to chicks that jump out of there outfits in the hallway.
Paperclip = redneck birth control, unfourtunitly all control has been lost at this point.
People should always have a paper clip with them, you never know when it might come in handy after a night of heavy drinking. Plus they’re great at parties!
The little girl next door was wearing big mama’s thong. Hence the paperclip. or…. Paris Hiltons latest fad is catching on “paperclip jewelry…thats hot!”
The paperclip held the note that identified the thong as belonging to (insert name here).
MacGyver scored! Lucky bastard. Do you think he was going to bend the paperclip into an IUD?
Patrick, That is nasty. love Hoop
Hey! You found CLIPPY! I wondered where he went…
When a woman asks a man, “Is that a paperclip in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?” You know you’ve got troubles.
Eww, is it just me or does that thong have a yellowish tinge to the bottom of it. Im not so sure she made it into the door.
She mated with the tin man from Wizard of Oz and that is one of his pubic hairs.
Nope more like the tin man kidnaped her ass for peeing on his carpet :P
Seems to me that that IS a welcome mat. I feel welcome already
Hey dave. Any pics of the neighbor? I need a visual
LMAO Meka!
But the only thing I was thinking was that the paperclip could have been to hold the thong together. But why did it burst?
Dave, is she fat?
Hey how long does it take to get a password:(….I have a way cool pic:( :?:
I think the paper clip was holding condom packs to the inside of the thong. The always prepared attitude.
For the record, I try to keep my
on my ass. I agree with everyone else, Dave. Your neighbors sound skanky!
It doesn’t take any amount of time, Becky. You make your own passwords up.
i’m thinkin’ it’s time to invite these chicks over for a couple of drinks….
Clip Tart
I wondered where I left my things!! DeJavue
Sorry Dave! The paper clip held an open invitation to the bearer for freaky monkey sex, and I’m afraid I beat you to it!! I’m mailing it back to you, just ignore the stains! :P
the paper clip is a chinese guys dick helper. dick helper-some thing added on to a dick to help the woman feel it inside her
heh!
Maybe she was stealing office supplies?
I’d hate to think she was smuggling them in there
actually the “skirt” is a top, the elastic part covers the boobs…. it probly just slipped off her and on the way down got caught on the paperclip that held the condom on her panties and pulled them down with it. she probly noticed and picked the condom up, cuz you know she’ll need it.
Doesn’t that just paint a very strange, but pleasant picture? Hey Dave, too bad you only got to see the…um…party droppings at your door…THAT would’ve made a great story.
Ditto, easy way to do it, stop her in the hall ask her if you could take her picture for the memories(tried it before and it worked)just in case you ever moved again. Then we ALL could see what your apparently drunken, nymphomaniac, paperclip-fetished, party-girl neighbor looks like. Just for our memories…that all…really.
sounds great