Unlikely candle scents

I bought a candle. The label said, “Fig-Olive”, which sounds like rather a revolting combination, but actually smells quite good. These, however, may not.

  1. “The Toronto” A tantalizing combination of raccoon musk and overturned garbage can
  2. Last Year’s Yogurt
  3. “CSI” Experience forensic science in 8 and 10 inch tapers
  4. Burnt broccoli-melting styrofoam
  5. Unwashed Mawashi
  6. $2 Whore
  7. Wet Dog fur. Nuff said
  8. “The Bender” Tom Waits’ breath after a two week drinking binge
  9. Campground outhouse
  10. State Fair Petting Zoo
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34 comments:

  1. rust, 19, August 2005, 0:43 |  

    “Moosepants” — Musk and Butt meet to give a provocative odour only a Canadian could appreciate.

     
  2. JFLY, 19, August 2005, 0:51 |  

    #1 Primate House
    #2 After the Game
    #3 Sauteed Garlic
    #4 Fisherman’s Wharf
    #5 Basement Musk
    #6 Grandma
    #7 Boiled Kidneys
    #8 Kitty Litter
    #9 Chicago Stockyards
    #10 Leftover Sauerkraut

     
  3. CJ, 19, August 2005, 3:09 |  

    How about, “One Week Full Diaper Pail” for a lovely candle fragrance? As for the link, what kind of lame-ass kid is this that he even thought to do this?, and how the hell did he manage to find a prom date to go with him looking like he came out of the recycling bin? And the hair? FRO-NO-NO! BTW, Dave- I’ve been reading for about a week now, and have never laughed so hard at a site!

     
  4. Spud, 19, August 2005, 3:30 |  

    odour de toilete
    scent duois puke

    :boobs:

     
  5. Bob Boyn, 19, August 2005, 4:27 |  

    Diaper filled with Indian food

     
  6. Bob Boyn, 19, August 2005, 4:29 |  

    The guy with the coke cans is Screech,right?

     
  7. Davezilla, 19, August 2005, 6:58 |  

    I rather thought him the love child of Yahoo Serious and Napoleon Dynamite. :twisted:

     
  8. Nikki, 19, August 2005, 7:03 |  

    Duct tape would have been more comfortable.

     
  9. Merth, 19, August 2005, 9:36 |  

    As big of a hit as Napoleon Dynamite was… this kid might have been prom queen… err king.

    Failed candle scents:
    1. Dirty Sanchez
    2. Chili Dog
    3. wet dog
    4. corporate office ambience
    5. cloride & amonia

     
  10. Mikel, 19, August 2005, 10:05 |  

    The new Burbon Street during Mardi Gras scent!!

     
  11. mikeB, 19, August 2005, 11:11 |  

    I just looked up #5 mawashi. Dude. No. No. No. :dead:

     
  12. jindun, 19, August 2005, 12:35 |  

    Is that guys date Kelly Osbourne? Oh, what about Weed & Coors D-light

     
  13. michel v, 19, August 2005, 12:41 |  

    And then there’s Slipknot incense. I wonder if it smells like the band backstage after a concert.

     
  14. Anonymous, 19, August 2005, 12:52 |  
    Davezilla

    How about “ass n’ Sack” That lovely odor eminating from the location in question that men generate after a hot sweaty day in breifs!

     
  15. Anonymous, 19, August 2005, 12:53 |  
    Davezilla

    “Baby Burp”

    If you have kids - you know what I’m talking about

     
  16. rust, 19, August 2005, 12:54 |  

    also failed:
    “GREAT WHITE” — a mixture of styrofoam and burnt hair.

     
  17. Anonymous, 19, August 2005, 12:55 |  
    Davezilla

    “Levorotary Sweetness”

    That lovely smell that barroom urinals give off a 2:00 in the morning

     
  18. Anonymous, 19, August 2005, 12:57 |  
    Davezilla

    “Decomposing Passion”

    That ever so pleasant scent that dead animals in your attic give off after dying there 3 weeks ago in the middle of the summer…

     
  19. Bob Boyn, 19, August 2005, 12:59 |  

    Spellcheck people! What the hell is a leveratory!

     
  20. Anonymous, 19, August 2005, 12:59 |  
    Davezilla

    “Neighboring flatulence”

    That wondrous oder that one cubical in every office building has - where the “old guy” sits.

     
  21. MIKE, 19, August 2005, 14:06 |  

    The first fart in the morning after a night of beer on tap and pickeled eggs

     
  22. rust, 19, August 2005, 14:17 |  

    “Kippers ‘n’ Kabbage” — a lustful fragrance based on English salted fish and German sauerkraut. YUMMY!

     
  23. Themrdoug, 19, August 2005, 14:30 |  

    Eteu De….
    China:-(
    Fried Dog Poop :!: Hockey bag :mad: Burnt Hair :dead:

    Coke can tux? Lame. What happened to the old days when you would go to prom for 15 min and spend the next 15 hours drinking to a near death experience?

     
  24. Mumbles, 19, August 2005, 15:19 |  

    “Ann Coulter”

     
  25. Dante, 19, August 2005, 16:13 |  

    Cum-scented candles?

     
  26. Keith Burgin, 19, August 2005, 19:27 |  

    The new scent from Tommy Holefinger… “Urp”

    The scent of a dead man’s rotting nutsack combined with just a hint of jasmine.

     
  27. pappy, 19, August 2005, 21:10 |  

    I’ve got one.

    Ode de band members who don’t wear deodorant after a full day of band camp..

    Sorry, personal experience. I had camp this week. Bleh. :dead:

     
  28. tinamarie, 19, August 2005, 22:41 |  

    Okay, so he’s got a coke can tuxedo, but what is this?

    http://www.burntvelvet.net/gondaba/P1010204.JPG

    Looks like a coke can cock!

     
  29. Steppenwolf, 20, August 2005, 1:40 |  

    Dingleberry Delight

     
  30. C-rolla, 20, August 2005, 8:19 |  

    Candle Scents:
    1. Trailer
    2. Fromunda
    3. Tijuana Nights

     
  31. troidious, 20, August 2005, 10:43 |  

    :-?…..FOOT DE FUNGUS #5
    Acid Reflux & egg
    More than a memory-
    (onion & cilantro in goat cheese)

     
  32. banda, 20, August 2005, 22:17 |  

    1. Upper Decker
    2. Bong Water
    3. Fraternity Carpet
    4. Bourbon Street
    5. Holding Cell
    6. H1B Contract Programmer
    7. Septic Tank
    8. Forgotten Tupperware
    9. Jock Itch
    10. City Garbage Strike

     
  33. ramjet, 21, August 2005, 16:15 |  

    i say felching farm fields– meaning a piss infected cum bubble dripping from an anthrax infected sheeps asshole! sick sick sick

     
  34. Natalie, 21, August 2005, 22:00 |  

    Cat Breath Scent would be pretty bad.