Pickup lines that suck

“I suppose a lot of men stare at your tits, huh?”

“You like cartoon rabbits, too? I like dressing up as one in bed.”

“That’s a really sexy bra. I stole one just like that from my neighbor’s clothesline.”

“Lemme have a few more beers first so you look pretty.”

“That’s a hot dress. Makes you kind of look like a hooker. Wait, you’re not a cop, are you?”

“You remind of someone. My frat brother, Gunther. Man, could he put away the beer!”

“I really wish they’d rerun BJ and the Bear. I could be watching that while you make me dinner.”

“If your taste in men is anything like your bad taste in clothes, then I’m perfect for you.”

“Is that really your nose? Dayum!”

“I slept with Michael Jackson.”

Tags: .

18 comments:

  1. Dante, 25, June 2005, 1:25 |  

    “You’re so hot I could fry bacon on you”

    “I want you to be my acrobat”

    “You’re wearing your pants way too high. Let me lower them”

    “All aboard the first train to funkytown…by which I mean bed”

    “I say, your visual appoplexies are stunningly boner-conducive!”

    Don’t ask me from where I got those…:razz:

     
  2. TinaMarie, 25, June 2005, 2:10 |  

    Never forget the old standby “If I told you that you have a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?”

    My favorite is “Hey babe–can I put my front end connector into your GUI (prounounced gooey) interface?” :grin:

     
  3. Nikki, 25, June 2005, 7:57 |  

    Are you a differentiable function? Because I’d like to be tangent to your curves!

     
  4. Moxie, 25, June 2005, 9:35 |  

    “Hi My name is Tom Cruise and your a magnificent women”

     
  5. Ron, 25, June 2005, 10:53 |  

    Oldie but a goodie:

    “If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?”

     
  6. rust, 25, June 2005, 11:28 |  

    worst pickup line ever:

    “Pull my finger!”

     
  7. Davezilla, 25, June 2005, 16:54 |  

    Nikki rules. She’s giving me a geek :wang:

     
  8. DK, 25, June 2005, 18:31 |  

    You look a lot like my sister-slash-first cousin!:roll:

     
  9. rust, 25, June 2005, 20:25 |  

    Hey, nice CAMEL-TOE!

     
  10. Spud, 25, June 2005, 21:48 |  

    Hi there, I’ve been watching you for awhile now…

    Hi, you know you look strangely familiar…

    Gidday babe, how about a drink?

    Hey there, when’s the baby due…

     
  11. GrumpySimon, 25, June 2005, 22:21 |  

    Ahoy there! My name be Captain Bluebeard. Be thar an x painted on the seat of thy pants, wench?

    Methinks there be fabulous booty buried within!

     
  12. Esther, 26, June 2005, 2:59 |  

    “Hey babe, I’ve got my very own website. Wanna be on it?”

     
  13. Keith Burgin, 26, June 2005, 4:04 |  

    “I don’t need a condom, baby… I’ve got a shovel and a bag of lime in my trunk.”

     
  14. Mandy, 26, June 2005, 10:27 |  

    Remind me not to date Keith Burgin! :wtf:

     
  15. notinlove, 26, June 2005, 14:41 |  

    Keith, thank you for sharing that image, it is truly the most unpleasant oneliner ever heard, now jump into this hole and I’ll bury you. *strikes Kieth on head with a ten pound maul* :dead:

     
  16. Daniel O'Connor, 27, June 2005, 5:46 |  

    Do you do anal, because apparently I’m a real asshole…

    Oops.

     
  17. Anonymous, 3, July 2005, 23:55 |  
    Davezilla

    :boobs::cool::thong::undies::boxers::limp::wang::java::boobs::boobs:

     
  18. Andrew, 4, July 2005, 3:46 |  

    Hey babe, do you like raisins? How bout a date?

    Nice pants, they would look even better on my floor.

    Do you wash your pants in Windex, cause I can see myself in ‘em.

    Are you from Tennessee cause you’re the only 10 I see.

    Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?

    Are your legs tired? cause you’ve been running through my mind all day.

    I could go on like this all night:twisted: