Overheard: Q’Doba Edition

Was eating in a local Mexican chain and the New Age Hippie Beast next to me in line carried on the following conversation:

Line Cook (LC): What would you like, Ma’am?
New Age Hippie Beast (NAHB): I want … that vegetable grilled buh-meeta?
LC: Fajita?
NAHB: That’s the one.
LC: What kind of salsa would you like on it?
NAHB: What kind do you have?
LC: Mild, Medium, Hot and Corn Salsa.
NAHB: I’ll have Ranch.
LC: We … don’t have Ranch.
NAHB: I saw the word Ranch somewhere.
LC: Here?
NAHB: Maybe it was at home.
LC: OK, well we don’t have Ranch.
NAHB: OK, well which one is like Ranch?
LC: None of them, really.
NAHB: Is there Ranch?

Tags: .

32 comments:

  1. Hobbit, 22, November 2004, 0:05 |  

    That picture is my life.

     
  2. Hobbit, 22, November 2004, 0:07 |  

    *does the first to comment dance*

     
  3. Lace Valentine, 22, November 2004, 0:25 |  

    Flash back to hippie beast as an infant
    sucking on one grapefruit sized :boobs:
    hippy baby looks up: “YOU GOT RANCH?!!”

     
  4. Esther, 22, November 2004, 0:46 |  

    Reading that made my head hurt.:sad:

     
  5. Moxie, 22, November 2004, 1:01 |  

    She probably just got off the ranch.

     
  6. Spud, 22, November 2004, 1:54 |  

    I see nothing wrong with that conversation, seems perfectly normal to me.

    :???:

    got any tomato sauce?

     
  7. kismet, 22, November 2004, 3:07 |  

    Ranch!? On a fajita!?

    You’re in a mexican restaurant! Get the damn salsa and be happy! Maybe even the guacamole, but for fucks sake don’t ask for ranch.

    An ex-girlfriend of mine once ordered french fries in a mexican restaurant, I kicked her in the shin and the waiter laughed at her.

    Then I told her, “No, you can’t have the french fries. I know it’s on the menu, but it’s like the cheeseburger at the chinese place, you just don’t order it.” :roll:

     
  8. Commando Stacy, Official Davezirra Bad Kitty, 22, November 2004, 3:41 |  

    Meanwhile, back at the ranch …

    New Age Vegetarian Hippie Beast finally gets his fucking RANCH at home only to discover …

    … it’s BACON RANCH!:

     
  9. Anna, 22, November 2004, 4:58 |  

    She’s different ……… so shoot the bitch!!

     
  10. frisko, 22, November 2004, 6:38 |  

    The link forced me to first laugh, then I realized I was laughing at turds.
    I am not caffinated yet.

    Frisko

     
  11. Davezilla, 22, November 2004, 6:46 |  

    It’s art, frisko. Activist art. Resume giggles. :smile:

     
  12. girl, 22, November 2004, 7:04 |  

    when I was a kid and my parents made me tag a long to a Chinese restaurant that they liked, I always ordered fried chicken and mashed potatoes. nothing like some Chinese fried chicken. mmmm.

     
  13. frisko, 22, November 2004, 7:08 |  

    Since the “art” was photographed as closer up photos, I hope they had a lense to do deed, and didn’t have to kneel down.

    I am still laughing

    Frisko

     
  14. Davezilla, 22, November 2004, 7:13 |  

    Did everyone click on the free flags link? The artist wants us to make more and keep the meme going around the world.

     
  15. Spud, 22, November 2004, 7:13 |  

    I saw this story about “art” once that was, get this…

    A table
    an ashtray full of cigarette butts
    beer cans, some upright, others on their sides
    beer all over the table
    pizza boxes
    bits of half eaten pizza
    crap everywhere basically

    Anyhow, early one morning the cleaners come into the gallery and proceed to, well clean.

    The company got into all sorts of trouble for cleaning up the “art”

    The cleaner explained that he just thought it was the left overs of the night before party.

    Just thought I’d share that, don’t ask me why.

    :java:

     
  16. ReV.JeLLyBaBy, 22, November 2004, 7:22 |  

    In my experience it is a fact that most people visit a foreign restaurant in order to try some of the dishes associated with that chosen culture, but then there is always the exception.

    The woman Dave encountered can only be described as “special”.

    These are the type of people that try to order a bacon sandwich in an Indian restaurant or go for a Chinese meal during the New Year (Chinese) and demand “number 4” on the menu (pronounced sei) on a black and white plate and throw half of it away anyway.

    Not such a biggie?

    Now if I tell you that:

    Sei also means death and most Chinese will say 2 + 2 instead during this time.

    Black and White symbolize death

    Throwing things away is also bad and for God’s sake don’t give the waiter a clock as a present…………….

    It means you are counting the days till his/her funeral!

    My advice for the “specials”…….

    Stay indoors and stick to frozen meals for one please or go read. Or as a tasty treat!

    Why not try fugu.

    :???:

     
  17. Mandy, 22, November 2004, 7:51 |  

    My, ReV. What a bundle of sunshine we are today. :kiss:

     
  18. ReV.JeLLyBaBy, 22, November 2004, 8:02 |  

    Sorry Mandy……..

    Maybe I was a bit harsh on the woman in todays post.

    Perhaps I’ll invite her for a candle lit dinner for two.

    In Burger King,……I hear the “Ranch Sauce” is a culinary delight in itself.

    :razz:

     
  19. rust, 22, November 2004, 10:40 |  

    The “Special” at “Roma” down at the bottom of the hill: Giant Hamburger only $1.200 (Two bucks US) The buns are like 8 or 10″ — I’ve never measured. Four mystery-meat patties fried up in a skillet-wok-blackthing on a toasted bun (in the pizza oven) served on a generous layer of avocado (guacamole, locally here called “palta”), with sliced tomato and mayonnaise. It’ll give you the shits for a day at least, so I don’t recommend having one of these every day. How can McDougals or Burger Queen compete?

    Oh, they don’t have Ranch. I’ve asked already.

     
  20. Esther, 22, November 2004, 11:40 |  

    I agree w/the ReV here, that woman is definitely ’special’…’special K,’ most definitely.:???:

     
  21. Natalie, 22, November 2004, 11:59 |  

    NAHB needs to learn that those sage “smudge sticks” aren’t for smoking.

     
  22. Cheap Date, 22, November 2004, 12:24 |  

    The line cook SHOULD have given this moron a BUTT-MEAT-UH!

    First of all, if you can’t PRONOUNCE the dish, don’t attempt to, ask for assistance.

    Second, calling it a BUH MEETA is just RIDICULOUS!

    Third, I hate hippies!

    :razz:

     
  23. dagny, 22, November 2004, 14:24 |  

    I fail to understand the ranch obsession… to me it is made for salads and raw veggies and THAT’S IT.

     
  24. mikeB, 22, November 2004, 15:06 |  

    Exactly. Salds, veggies and taking baths in.

     
  25. Spud, 22, November 2004, 16:36 |  

    That’s a disturbing picture mike, a hippy in a bath of Ranch dressing.

    There’s a joke in there somehwere…

    Waht do you call a hippy in a bath of ranch dressing?

    A buh meeta

     
  26. bitch, 22, November 2004, 19:50 |  

    I put ranch on my cunny once and let my dog go at it.

     
  27. Spud, 22, November 2004, 20:13 |  

    I did not need to know that.

    :dead:

     
  28. Davezilla, 22, November 2004, 21:10 |  

    Nor I. Guess who’s been permanently banned?

     
  29. Esther, 22, November 2004, 23:32 |  

    Hopefully her and her little dog, too.:razz:

     
  30. Commando Stacy, Official Davezirra Bad Kitty, 23, November 2004, 2:40 |  

    Good Lawdy, Lawdy!

    I know I’m delerious when I come back here after I day of chasing rabbits, phone calls from hookah smoking caterpillars, a ton of business in the works, you know, the usual … and I read Dave’s above comment in #11:

    “It’s art, frisko. Activist art. Resume giggles.”

    … as resumé giggles.

    … and resumed giggling at the thought of Frisko laughing at turds (I was too), and at the thought of giggles on one’s resumé, like:

    “pr0n video clerk, Ferndale, MI — 2001-2002 LOL! HA HA HA!”

    :limp:

    Then girl had to bring up both soul food and Chinese food, and I suddenly got very hungry. As you probably know, Chinese is considered “Jewish soul food.”

    :grin:

    I kept reading, and got to comment #20, which was by my girl Esther. It reminded me of a Japanese exchange student I once knew whose name was “Dioseke” … pron. “Dice-K” … and of course, guess what we all called him?

    Special K.

    :roll:

    Cheap Date then put me over the top with comment #22, and I started laughing hysterically, for one of my friends from high school (the only one I still talk to regularly, in fact) is an Indian girl named Meeta. (Dots, not feathers, y’all.) :wtf:

    I LOVE MEETA.

    But… Meeta is neither a hippie, nor do I know how she feels about ranch dressing. I’ll have to ask her tomorrow.

    In the meantime, I am quite a hippie, though not a very good one, for I like to eat things that used to have a face (so long as they never used to oink nor have a shell), and I drive an SUV.

    Oh, such a flip-flopper I am!

    :lol::grin:

    I do, however, like to dip my pizza in ranch dressing, though I’m not sure how or when I started that. I just always have. (You should try it sometime, it’s pretty good.)

    :neutral:

    Thank you to Dave and his flying monkeys for banning “bitch” and her little dog, too. Props to Esther for that one, though I’m not sure how “pretty” somebody with ranch on their cunny would actually be.

    :roll::limp:

    I’m really not going anywhere with this at all. As I said, I’m pretty damn delerious at the moment.

    :boobs::boobs:

    I’ll leave you with this, from one of my favourite people:

    “You know why vegans are so damn angry all the time? It’s because THEY’RE HUNGRY!!” - Margaret Cho

    :razz:

     
  31. ReV.JeLLyBaBy, 23, November 2004, 3:04 |  

    Well Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore!

    :???:

     
  32. Spud, 23, November 2004, 5:12 |  

    Really? then where the hell are we you freaked out little tramp? you do realise it’s dinner time don’t you? and you know how I get if I don’t get my dinner!