Davezilla: Clean Humor, Filthy Comments

Ever watched the credits roll at the cinema or on television all the way to the end? Your eyes get so used to the upward motion of the credits that when they finally stop your eyes suddenly get the illusion that the room is falling slightly.

My whole life is like that.

1. Guys who wear t-shirts with tuxedos printed on them.
2. People who finish their sentences by clucking their tongue. Every time.
3. I don’t mind the odd lawn gnome or statue of Mary, but when it gets to be a village…
4. People whose entire philosophical base can be summarized through the 18 bumperstickers littering their Chevy Astro.
5. Coworkers who feel every situation warrants a line from Homer Simpson.
6. People who take “pitchers” with their “point ‘n’ snaps”.
7. Anyone who whips out their gold card at the dollar store
8. Men who claim to have confronted and fought off Bigfoot.
9. Drivers who take pains to pass you when you were already speeding, get directly in front of you and promptly slow down.
10. John Ashcroft